Bodies & fetishes
Oral: a beginner's guide
Taking your time with your mouth. Receiving more oral sex is linked to more orgasms for women in large surveys.
In the quiz
- Oral
- Finishing on your partner’s face
- Rough oral where one of you sets the pace
- Deep throat to the point of gagging
How to start
- Slow down. Kiss everywhere else first.
- Ask what they like, and pay attention to their reactions.
- Use your hands too.
- For more intensity, let the person receiving set the pace.
How to keep it safe
- Agree on a tap signal for when talking isn’t possible.
- Gagging is a reflex. Go slowly and stop on the signal.
- STI testing matters for oral too.
What you need
- Starter: a pillow under the hips.
- Upgrade: a flavored water-based lube.
Ideas to try
- An oral-only night.
- One of you gives directions the whole time.
Is your partner into it too?
Take the quiz on your own phones. You'll only see oral in your results if you both said some kind of yes.
Sources
- Frederick et al. (2018). Differences in orgasm frequency among gay, lesbian, bisexual, and heterosexual men and women in a U.S. national sample. Archives of Sexual Behavior.
- Herbenick et al. (2017). Sexual diversity in the United States: Results from a nationally representative probability sample of adult women and men. PLOS ONE.
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Educational, not medical or legal advice. Updated 2026-11-09.